Kjærlighet (Norwegian) Love

Part of a trilogy, one of which I have already reviewed in my blog, this film is about two colleagues with very different approaches to sex and romance. Honest, thoughtful, and daringly talky as it observes modern dating customs in the age of apps, this may test your patience because it is heavily dialogue focused and a lot of time it also feels like the film maker wants to give an ode to city of Oslo, just like his previous film 'Sex' was. I wouldn't call this specifically a gay themed film, but one of the characters is gay and we do get an insight on gay perspective around sex, love, relationships through his perspective which is interesting.

The film starts with Marianne, a physician specializing in urology, giving a patient the news about prostate cancer. The make nurse Tor spots that the patient may not have understood and absorbed what has just been told to him, and makes sure to seek him out to get further clarifications. The subtle scene tells us that Marianne may understand men's biology but not their mind, something Tor believes himself to be more conversant with as a gay man. They meet later on ferry where Marianne is headed for a party to met a guy who her friend thinks may like while Tor later explains her how he uses Grindr to scout out potential lovers and often finds himself having trysts on the ferry itself, with guys who cover the whole gambit of male sexuality, from straight men into cruising to out ones looking for a life partner. Tor’s happy embrace of casual sex seems to linger with Marianne. Her curiosity is peaked and one day when a stranger ends up talking to her on the ferry, she ends up having casual sex, which she enjoys physically but not emotionally. Meanwhile Tor meets a man Bjorn on ferry, an older guy who is more old school and doesn't't understand today's gay world. Tor sees him later at hospital who just got bad news and had to have prostate surgery. From there, an at-first-nonsexual relationship develops that brings out Tor’s more domestic, tender side, an aspect that’s clearly helped him to be an excellent nurse.

Although the film shows us perspective on love and relationship and casual sex from both a straight female and a gay male's perspective, it does make some interesting points about friendship as well as romance. The two people are different. One is more free while other is more focused on possible connections and they air out their preconceived notions about what love and sex could mean given their hang-ups. It is a tender, gently observed relationship study that places as much stock in casual sex as in seeking a soulmate. We see how Marianne can benefit from diving into the no-strings unknown, just Tor and Bjorn mutually benefit from a committed but unlabelled sort of companionship. Its mature approach to love and compromise and compassion and relationship is wonderful and welcome in a gay male romance field of childish and self-centered men. There are certain scenes that standout, especially one towards the end, when Tor is helping out Bjorn at his place and Bjorn delivers a monologue about his sexual experiences back in the 80s. The concept of two gay men from different generations discussing their differences, particularly around AIDS was a very powerful scene. By the film’s end, both Marianne and Tor have moved towards different positions. She’s embraced hook-ups, while he has rediscovered his emotions by becoming Bjorn’s caretaker. Both have come to value relationships that don’t look like the normative version of romance. The film doesn't have any villains, big twists or action scenes---not does it need any for that matter because it's a slice of life. It is a slow film, so be patient but to does reward you some very interesting perspective on the changing definition of love in today's times. (6/10)